|My Dad and his wife, Joyce, circa 1983|
(written on May 1, 2014)
Today, May 10th, is the day that we say our final good-byes and celebrate the lives of two people that we love so dearly-my father (John) and his wife of 30 years, Joyce Mondoy. I can't even begin to imagine where my heart and head will be on this day-I'm sure, sodden with grief. But, with my family and the community of Moloka'i, we will celebrate with joy, their lives. I know the church (St. Damien of Molokai) will not be able to fit everyone who attends, but everyone will make do as they can and be joyful, as that is the 'Moloka'i style'.
I thought it befitting to post this image from my brother, Roy's image file. It's a sweet picture of the two of them. Although technically, Joyce is my step mother-she did not raise me or my siblings as we were all adults when they got married. She did, however, become a good friend to me as we got to know one another over the years.
I was as 'ready' as I ever could've been to say goodbye to my Dad. When I was home in August, 2012, and went to mass with both of them, I knew that the next time I set foot in that church would be for my father's funeral. I certainly was not ready to say good-bye to Joyce, though. Which goes to show you that you should always be ready (my mother's mantra to me while growing up). And, you know, our Western culture doesn't like to talk much about or celebrate death as we celebrate new life. But, we should. We manufacture a life that does not include death. But, it is as much a part of life just as birth is. And grief? It takes as long as it does and for each of us, that journey is different-as it is for each person that we lose. There is no prescribed time line that we must be 'over it'.
|St. Damien Church, Kaunakakai, Moloka'i, August, 2012|
Dad and Joyce have left this physical world that we know and have gone on. I'm happy for them, sad for me. And now, not even their shadows remain...
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